I ran 15 miles-- huge milestone for me

I ran 15 miles today. FIFTEEN! By far, the longest run I have ever ran.

By the 12th mile, I started to hurt. I tend to waddle by that length of time.... moving left and right as i run forward. I wasn't planning on running 15. Only 12.

(ha! O N L Y twelve).

But. Heidi called me last night just before i was headed for bed and said, "ya wanna run 17 miles tomorrow?"

"Seventeeeeeeen!?!??!"

She asked me while I was in North Carolina last week if I would be her running partner to train for a full marathon. I didn't think much about it and said, "yeah, sure! maybe!" But... more than a week later and nothing had progressed, I started not to take that offer seriously. And I actually started to feel relieved.

I only ran five miles while on vacation. The week before I think I ran maybe seven miles between two separate runs. The week before that, maybe only four. I have been negligent and it shows in my speed and how it feels in my body while running.

But this morning I ran.

We ran from downtown Sebastopol to Graton and back.... but we also ran around downtown first.

We planned on running seventeen miles, and it could have happened if not for us noticeably slowing down our run in this neighborhood as we soaked in all this wonderful metal sculptures in every single yard!

It's incredible.


We laughed. We sighed.
We imagined ourselves making these. We took in deep breaths.
We stared. We marveled.
We longed. We wished. We loved.

The street is called Florence Street in downtown Sebastopol, CA.


Hardly not my best run. But by the time I made the finish stretch, it felt good that i had accomplished this milestone.

I now need to work on my speed.

The race is less than a month away and now my game is on.

vacation

I am back from vacation.

Again? some are asking. I have traveled quite a bit during the past four to five months. Some are just two or three night getaways.

But I need them. Anyone who scoffs and says to me, I am too busy to take time off... I seriously see them as someone who is on the verge of a burnout.

Getaways are essential. They don't have to be expensive. But I'm not so sure about these stay-cations people are talking about. Oh sure! They are excellent for cleaning out the garage and working in the yard and catching up on all those things on your To-Do List, but they don't slow down the mind.

And that is essential for the mind and spirit to have that recharge time.

And you know, you can even visit a friend over the weekend. When you are not home, your mind isn't busy planning or worrying about all the things that need to be done. You are in the moment and not thinking about paying the bills, watering the lawn, buying groceries.

When you are away, you are merely in the moment.

And if you're a lot like me, (and i think you are)... then you're all for calming the mind, rejuvenating your spirit and inspiring your soul.

If you haven't gone anywhere in some time, it's time to go somewhere.

Do it now.

You deserve that.

Upcoming Hurricane Earl (and flies on the butter)

Granddaddy's Home

I am in historic Swansboro, North Carolina.

It's a town I have visited often.

My granddaddy lived here for many years. And my relatives still own a home here, so happily for me, I still can visit often.

I love this town!



I am on vacation here for a week, waking up early and spending most of my time on Emerald Isle collecting beautiful sea shells while gazing out over the emerald green gentle warm waves.

Though this morning, I woke up extra early and ran. I was surprised how hot it was so early. No wind. Just very hot "heater" air. It sucked me in as I ran. Wondered if it was because of this hurricane that is 100 miles up from the coast. Is this the calm before the storm? I figured that was probably it.

So I shrugged it off and ran. I ran and I ran.

Sweat dripped and poured down my fingers... as I ran nearly five miles before giving up. The town is so small, .... i kept duplicating my route. I slowed down and walked through the old graveyard as I caught my breath. And while i ran past the cats sleeping on the pavement next to Yana's... i couldn't help feeling hungry, smelling the lingering delicious bacon smells.

Yana's

So many people in this tiny town were sitting on their porches sipping on coffee. Their hair still shaped from their pillow. I waved to them, "Good Morning!" .... Sometimes twice and three times over.

I was about to quit running, when Wyonna's song, "Flies on the Butter" song came on over my earphones so I decided to run the town once more while the song played out... running slowly past Granddaddy's home.... missing him in a big way:

Old tin roof, leaves in the gutter
A hole in the screen door big as your fist, and flies on the butter
Mamaw baking sugar cookies, we were watching cartoons
Heard her holler from the kitchen which one of you youngin's wants to lick the spoon?
Yellow jackets on the watermelon, honeysuckle in the air
Daddy turning on the sprinkler, us kids running through it in our underwear
Old dog napping on the front porch, his ear just a-twitching
Fell asleep on Granddaddy's lap to the sound of his pocket watch ticking

Oh, oh, oh - Oh, oh, oh
It doesn't seem like it was all that long ago
Oh, oh, oh - Oh, oh, oh
You can dream about it every now and then
But you can't go home again

-------

Tonight we are under a hurricane warning. Hurricane Earl.

It's calm right now. But the storm is supposed to hit tomorrow.

I'm a California girl.

I have no idea what this all means, but I've watched Big Brother and it seems they can live on (slop) PB&J sandwiches all week so I guess I'm set.

I'll keep you posted...

(This is the areal view of Swansboro below, so you can see how close we are to the water):

And here was my running route... (nearly the same route as the ariel view)

Having doubts running 1:1 intervals

I went running this morning with a few other women from my running group up at Annadel.

It was fantastic!

The fog was lifting above the lake .... and it felt magical! It was just under five miles but it was indeed the best run I've had in a long time.

And as we were standing by our cars parked down at the bottom of the hill, Kathy lifted her hands up and shouted, "Wow! I feel like a runner!"

This woman is one of the top runners in our group. She was a top placer in her age group in our last half marathon race... and yet, she didn't even feel like a runner.

Lately, none of us have felt like runners.

The group I ran with this morning are currently in training for another half marathon but this time, we are doing something completely different.

We are all running one minute intervals with a one minute walk break in between.

This is a specific plan designed to build our endurance and to better our times by running faster at our next half-marathon. And not only that, but he promises we will be sprinting at the finish line because we will feel so good.

Who doesn't want that!?!?!?

Unfortunately, we are all feeling frustrated with the results.

We are worried we are moving backwards and not moving forward. Many long-time runners in my group fear they are losing their ability to run any further than a minute without needing a walk break, as they have conditioned their bodies and mind to only run one minute at a time.

That's unsettling.

But this morning's run reminded me of the joy I felt last winter running with my trail running group. Each Sunday, I would come home from a training run after running further each week than the previous week and feeling so giddy with excitement over my accomplishment.

It was empowering, knowing our physical limits exist, but are far beyond our psychological ones.

Last Sunday we ran 10-1/2 miles. (1:1 minute intervals and attempting to run two minutes slower than our normal pace which is difficult and so far I have not been able to accomplish that goal).

According to to the handbook, when we are done running, we should feel great and feel as though we can run even further.

And that's true. We can run further.

But we don't push ourselves.

Instead, we collect our keys and get into our cars and drive home and in a quiet way, wondering if we really will break our best speed at this next race with the slow pace we are going.

I am open to new experiences. I am always desiring to learn and improve. But there's this dull sense of dread of not really believing in this particular system.

I'm worried. Can I really improve my speed at this next race by using this method? Is this method only for beginners?

We won't know until we know.

In the meantime, I'm going to set aside for additional running beyond the 1 minute intervals and hope that doesn't mess things up.

The race is on 10-10-10 ..... which actually can turn out to be a very magical day indeed.

I'll keep you informed.

My Birthday

I celebrated my birthday this month so it's been extra busy.

And, in fact, it is one of the reasons why I haven't posted.

This month has been packed full.

I ran in the oldest 10k run in California. I've been volunteering as a pace coach for the Jeff Galloway Training Group. I have spent nearly every weekend going to or having barbecues with friends and family. I went on vacation. I was tour guide to out-of-state friends. And have been busy doing what I love best: Illustrating and designing all kinds of fun, cool stuff!!

But the biggest thing that I experienced this month was my birthday.

It's a milestone and thought-provoking to say the least.....

Ya wanna hear about it? Well then, you must come back and visit.

Be back in August...

A Joke

So ya wanna hear a joke?

What did Zero say to Eight?

"Nice belt."

hahahaha

Then....

What did Zero say to Eighty-Eight?

"Where are you guys getting these things?"

Leaving it all behind me

This has been such a lovely weekend.

I ran a short 4-mile trail this morning and as I was running along the winding pathways, I felt the weight of the week slowly peeling off me. I mentally released it to the wind... whispering, "be gone. go away!" And by the end of the 4th mile, I was sprinting toward my car.

I have been weighted down by fear lately.

All the what-ifs in my life started to invade my thoughts and i started to feel paralyzed by what could happen if my fears came to be and how would I weather the adversities?

I'm usually a positive person. I always hang out on the sappy side of optimism wearing my rose-colored glasses.

So I've been quite taken back by my reactions and the burdensome thought-processes that have taken place in recent months over personal circumstances that have began to instill fear in me.

Fear that I can't live the life the way I want to live it.

I came so close to throwing my hands up and saying, "okay. I lose!"

And then I had this Ah-Ha! moment.

You know how it is when you can visualize yourself eating a lemon? (go ahead and pretend with me ... I'll sit here and wait while you imagine yourself taking a large bite out of a sour lemon.... ). Go ahead. Imagine it. Pretend to yourself that you are biting deep into a lemon.

Did you notice your adrenal glands just tighten up? Because your body didn't know any different. It believed you when you pretended to bite into a lemon...

Whatever we put in our mind, our body reacts to it.

I started running about a year ago. And before I joined a running group, I didn't think I could run the length of a football field. And I couldn't! My body believed my thoughts!!

But while in the running group, I ran much further than a footfall field... because I experienced those around me doing it and somehow my mind was able to convince my body I could run it as well.

And I did... eventually running two 10ks and two half-marathons... and I have another 10k planned July 4th that I will run all within a one year calendar from the day I started to run.

Whether positive or negative, every word you and I speak and every thought we think is creating our life. It's also forging our future. Our thoughts are putting our future into motion.

While running along the lake this morning, I asked myself what I was really worrying about... and, then, i asked myself, would i like for this worrisome thought to actually take place and make my life its reality?

And the answer was a defiant NoOoOoOOoOo!

So I took all those negative, fearful thoughts that have been weighing me down and I left them alongside the trail as I ran on ahead without them. And it really feels great.

I really do feel that weight has been lifted from me.

And for the first time in a long, long time, I feel optimistic toward my future and look forward to a great day tomorrow.

I am wishing the same good wonderful stuff for you, too.

And then hope poured out

I came thisclose.

It’s the worst when you allow yourself to get excited.

Did you hear my exciting news... i would sometimes casually mention during a quiet lull in a conversation I had among friends. I kept it mostly secret for a week or two, but as the final day approached for it to become a done deal... I started to whisper the news more confidently.

Wow! This is really gonna happen! And I began to daydream of the possibilities and imagining how my life could be different based around this one contract.

But then it didn't happen. She had second thoughts about me being the perfect choice for her and by the way, thank you for all the time you invested in me, and have a great day!

And when that so-called promise keeper took my bag of dreams and blasted cold water into it, what else could i have done ... but to stand there firmly, holding my head high, and clutching with both hands onto what was left of this dream I was still holding.

When you reach that sort of disappointment, you kinda get all quiet and feel a little dead inside... like everything just turned dull and muted. The world continues on, but for a moment, all is made silent around you or turned and lulled into slow motion.

Potential freelance work sucks a lot of energy out of one self and if my life wasn't dependent on that extra income, I would be more than happy to kiss it goodbye for ever.

But when you have no other option, you just keep putting yourself out there.

And, you know what? We can’t have anything really great unless we put ourselves out there again and again. Taking risks that leave us standing there only holding onto a wet useless scrap of paper can actually open up a different door for us. It can make us turn our head in a different direction, revealing new things about ourselves.

Rejection forces us to confront ourselves in a whole different way, and it gives us a chance to focus on something bigger and better. The whole point in all of it? To grow, to learn, to get more enjoyment out of who we are ... and out of life and love.

Oh yeah. And so we remember to use sturdier containers to carry our hopes and dreams in.

Paper bags are really only good for recycling.

Half-Marathon in the Wine Country

i was sick for the half marathon.

... but i ran anyway. And it was amazing!


We wore chips on our shoes, and I was the only one wearing it backwards. I worried. "Will this still work?" I pointed down at the top of my shoe.

I asked nearly everybody. And everyone reassured me it would, since it's a chip... but i only half- believed them, because otherwise why did everyone but me have their chip facing away from them and mine was facing me, if it indeed didn't matter?

I was feeling low energy and didn't feel that adrenaline that usually hits me just before a race and I sorta prepared myself by shrugging the whole thing off, "well, if the chip doesn't work, it doesn't work... I'll know how long it took me to run it and that's all that really matters...."

But that wasn't the only thing that I was worried about. I was sick with a nasty chest cold. The chills-feeling fever, shortness of breath, wheezing, coughing up mucus, kind of cold. I swallowed a cough suppressant over-the-counter medicine 10 minutes before the race to help curb my cough and then the gun sounded.

"Here goes...." I whispered to myself and I took a deep breath, turned on my music, and off I went...... slowly at first, weaving in and around the slower runners ahead of me and as soon as I found an opening, I found myself running a good solid pace. Seven miles later, I was still running the same solid pace. Look at mee! I sang to myself. "Looook at meeeee! i'm running strong!"

It was by far my best race yet. I was amazed at my stamina. I ran past Mile 8 and I was running just as solid as I did when I first began. By Mile 10, I began to feel it in my legs... my I.T. Band started acting up again. I worried it would affect my running like it did during the Annadel Half Marathon up in the higher elevations. It did somewhat, but it didn't drastically affect my running.

The route was beautiful. Up and down small winding wine country roads. The weather was perfect and I felt terrific!



I loved that I didn't let anything stand in my way. I pushed past my fears of "should I run or should I not run?" because I knew my body would tell me what I could and could not do.

All I knew what I needed to do, was to lean down, lace up my shoes, and hit the pavement running... and then open myself up to the possibilities my body could or could not do.

I finished my race in 2 hours, 13 minutes.

Race Day is tomorrow

Race Day is tomorrow. And I am sick.

I've been sick for nearly a week now. Pounding headache. Fever. Aching body. Lost voice and a coughing so intense, so deep, I need to hold onto my ribs to soften the pain I feel each time I cough.

I haven't ran for a week. I've barely moved my feet. I look like the older folks you see shuffling down the street all wrapped up and shivering in the cold.

But yesterday morning, I woke up and felt a shift in my body. Was it my hopeful imagination?

Did I really feel improvement?

Today I have a worse cough, but no longer feel achy and the fever has been gone for two days now. Though I slept for more than twelve hours last night, I feel my energy returning.

It is no longer my imagination.

I'm going to go out there early tomorrow morning and run that race. My goal is to simply finish the Half Marathon. My other goal is not to get sicker after I finish the race... but to feel better and more empowered.

HA! Well, that is something only time will tell.

You know the saying, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger... so I'm putting my trust into the alternative....

Running across the Golden Gate Bridge and along the Embarcadero in San Francisco

This video says it all. It was amazing!

I was born in San Francisco and have spent a lot of time in this lovely City, but there were places I ran that I had never experienced before.

I had to hack off 13 minutes of this video but it will still give you a good sense of our 12-mile practice run.

We started off a the north end of the Golden Gate Bridge in the pouring rain and ran across the bridge and circled around to the bottom of the hill along the Golden Gate Promenade and ran to Ft. Point, stopping momentarily to touch the wall, and then back along the Promenade to Crissy Field while we got caught in the middle of a race... and then ran along Marina Blvd, past the Safeway toward Fort Mason, up to Prospect Park and down along the waterfront toward Fisherman's Wharf ... past the boat house and Aquatic Park and we turned around at the Hyde Street Pier (corner of Hyde and Jefferson, kitty-corner from the Cannery Building). The cable car turnaround/Buena Vista Cafe/Ghirardeli Square are all a tantalizing block up on the hill on Beach Street.

We then turned around and headed back the same way we had come.

It felt a lot like we were on the tv show: the amazing race.

I am so grateful for this wonderful experience. It was so fun, I barely noticed I was running. The plus side of running in such a beautiful place.

Running in the Wine Country

This past Sunday, I ran 11-1/2 miles in the Wine Country.

After experiencing a long week of feeling lousy about myself... for feeling weak and lame and wanting to throw in the towel ... I watched another episode of The Biggest Loser on TV and I was so inspired watching these folks fight through their physical and mental barriers, I decided i needed to do that, too.

If they can do that, then by golly, I can do that! 

I woke up extra early on Sunday morning, nervous and excited and thought this: "If I can run this, then I can run the half-marathon!.."

It was a gorgeous morning outside and it was so breath-taking (in more ways than one!) to run through such beautiful scenery!

I started off running at a slower pace, reminding myself that it's just a practice run and if my ham strings act up on me, I can walk as much as I need to ... but within the first mile, I had passed everyone but a couple of runners who started off at the front of the pack and i never saw them. Ever! Even on long stretches of roads, but that was okay, as I had forgotten they were even ahead of me.  

As far as I knew, I was leading the group and I felt strong. I felt empowered! And that felt GOOOD! 

I finished the training run in 2 hours and 5 minutes and burned nearly 1200 calories. I pushed myself a little, but not like I was racing. Just enough to help me over my previous hump. I finished without even breathing deeply.

I live in such a beautiful area. I kept looking up and seeing my surroundings of the rolling hills and the vineyards and the beauty of it all kept pushing me to keep on running.

I just signed up for the Half-Marathon to take place on May 22nd.  I haven't trained like I should, (there were some weeks I only ran one day) but I guess there's no better time than the present. (And I think I'm better trained than I had previously believed).

This coming Sunday morning we're running over the Golden Gate Bridge into San Francisco along the Embarcadero and back across the bridge. I'm really looking forward to it. I plan to videotape my experience and will post it early next week.

(coach marc's bike)

Hey, by the way: Here's the route I ran! Impressive, huh?  :O)

Running against the obstacles

So I ran.

And I ran and I ran... but I felt sore and lethargic and felt my calves were gonna explode. I kept up with the group for the first couple of miles and then I started to lose my pace... and the distance between us started to shift farther apart.
 
And when I finally finished the near 9 mile run, instead of feeling happy, I felt sorta defeated. I didn't wanna be last in my running group.

And I was last.

And maybe if my knee wasn't sore, and my hamstrings weren't giving me any trouble and my ankle felt strong... I would have done better.  And certainly if I ran more during the week, without question, I could have enjoyed a greater run.

I certainly don't run nearly as much as I did this past winter. Some weeks I just run one day. And never more than twice a week. My running buddies are now running while I'm at work. And running alone isn't as fun so I'm running less frequent, and in turn, each run I feel the struggle of it more and more.

Basically, I started to give up in my head. And you can't have that when you are running.

Sorry for the defeated post, but I am guessing we all feel this way at some point.  I feel sad and depressed and overcome.

Wishing for better days.  And they will come.  They do, ya know, and they will.

(By the way... the video I took while running is under a minute and if you watch it,  you can see how beautiful it was out there!)

I am so happy I experienced running in such a breathtaking, beautiful place amongst ferns, wild flowers, flowing rivers and eventually the Pacific Ocean.

Tomorrow I'll run again and see where it takes me. Because I know in my heart, it all begins with that first step and a new mind set.

I ran in a rain storm if that counts!

So i ran this morning. In the chilly rain and mud and wind.

I had all sorts of weird dreams while I slept last night. I dreamt I met Helen Keller on my run. She was doing so well. Or perhaps, I was not doing so well... and that is why we were running together. When she introduced herself to me, I was impressed to meet her and told her she was a house-hold name, but I didn't realize in my dream she was the one who was both blind and deaf. In my dream, i thought she was an awesome runner!

In another dream, I was driving in a flood and my car spun out of control and I was late for the run and as hard as I tried to make it to the start-off gun, I was too late.

Race runs always make me nervous. I spend a lot of time worrying about it as I sleep. But I slept good in between my sleep.  I slept in clean sheets and each time I tossed and turned and rolled over, I thought to myself, "awwww, this is so comfortable..."

It was raining hard when we started out this race. And it was cooler than the weather said it would be. I don't know how cold it was when we started the race, but when I was done running, it had only reached to 42 degrees.

I was excited to run with Heidi and Angie, but because the trails were so thin, they put us on staggered start times... depending on age.  We are such fierce rule followers, I am older than both and started five minutes ahead of them.

(Looking back,  I could kick myself.  What was I thinking!? I shoulda just blew my age off and started running with their age group!!)

I don't know where my head was, but I continued running alone the entire seven miles. And that was sooo not what I wanted to do!!! My dream and desire was to run with them, because ever since our half-marathon run back in early February, I've been running mostly alone and to be honest, I haven't been enjoying it so much. Running hasn't been as fun! I missed my running buddies!!

The race went okay. During the worst stretches, my calves were sooo tight, i thought they were about to burst. i was reduced to a shuffle, stumbling over one rock after another, running up hill.  i prayed for some downhills for they would call into action muscles that were fresh, ones that didn't hurt so badly.  Meanwhile, I kept looking over my shoulder, looking for Heidi and Angie.   

To no avail.

By the time I reached the 7th mile, I sprinted to the finish line. And then I stood there, shivering, and getting drenched in a downpour waiting for Angie and Heidi to reach me. Seven minutes later they were there and we were discussing whether or not we wanted to run back the seven miles we had just ran.

The truth is. I could have run it. And I should have run it. But it was that seven minutes standing there under a terrential downpour, i started to feel myself feeling stiff and cold.. and when Angie said, "Naww... this is good, I'm gonna head home for a hot shower.." .. i hafta say the hot shower felt inviting to me as well and I was set to head there, too.

So I looked at Heidi and told her I was quitting... and she nodded at me and as she turned around and started running back the same course all by herself,  I immediately felt bad for my decision and wanted soo badly to catch up and run alongside her.

But I didn't.

I didn't! 

I just stood here shivering in the cold... and knew I had made up my choice.  To play it safe. Not to risk any further injury.

But you know what? I could have run the 14 miles.

So I sit here and I feel like I sorta let myself down as I know I could have done it! And I should have done it, but I didn't do it. 

So... I'm quiet all day....... reassuring myself that it's all okay.

Running is a funny thing.  It IS competitive. And it IS fierce.
And some days ya feel powerful and on some days you're basically a whimp.

But I learned something today. If I don't ever wanna feel that heaviness I feel in my gut today, I will push myself forward. And I will.

One step at a time.

14-mile race tomorrow in the rain

Heidi called me this morning.

"Shawn, I know you and Angie might be running the relay team as partners tomorrow but I want to run both legs of the race. Do you guys wanna, too?"

To be honest, I had given up the idea of running in this race. I didn't get a confirmation back from Angie that she would run the race with me, and besides, the weather forecast calls for a cold steady rain all day. So I gave it up in my mind.  Didn't want to run seven miles in the rain. Actually felt relieved I didn't hear back from Angie.

As Heidi and I were starting to feel reluctance in running the full 14 miles and maybe run as a relay team together if Angie bails, Angie called Heidi and said, "Yes!"  She was willing to run the entire 14 miles with us. 

Then that settled it. Angie, Heidi and I are going to run both legs of the relay race tomorrow.

And, yes,  i'm ...  nervous!

I know i can do it. But I haven't been running on a consistent basis and I have never run that far before in my life, though it's just a little over a mile further than the half-marathon I ran back in February.

It's up at Annadel State Park and will cover a lot of hills.  Muddy hills. But after wading through the icy stream last weekend, I now know not to run around those puddles but to run through them. And, besides that, with all that rain, my shoes will be water-logged anyway.


I better go see if I have any clean running clothes. And I'll drink plenty of water.  Tomorrow morning is coming quickly.  Wish me luck.

Wading through icy waters

Early yesterday morning, Kelly, Karen, Angie and I drove up to Hood Mountain to tackle a difficult 10.72 miles up in the hills. Angie and I had never ran there before and we were both eager to experience something new.

What we didn't know then, was what exactly that new experience would be. And, we're both happy we didn't know about it... ahead of time.

And that's walking through frigid icy raging water.... twice!

But, wait. I'm already getting ahead of myself.  Let me start from the beginning.

We started our journey in temps in the low 30s and though i didn't see any patches of snow ... I was told there was still snow from a recent cold front. Angie's legs were covered in goosebumps from the chilly, icy air even while still sitting in the car. It was the kind of cold that when you spoke, you could see your breath.

I was secretly worried when I started off. Could I keep up?

Would I further injure my ankle? When you're cold, you feel everything sore on you. My knee where I hurt it back in January when I fell on a rock is still painful. I worried I'd fall again on the same knee.

I know that when I start to worry about falling, those feelings come from some other place. And yesterday morning, I knew that my fear was not about falling but all about failing.

We were all eager to start running to warm up.  My feet were so numb, I couldn't feel them as they hit the dirt. Karen pulled off her gloves and showed me her purplish-blue fingers. 

Within a mile or so, we all started to warm up and I was feeling good in my run and was curious why Karen and Kelly stopped up ahead when we reached the raging icy cold stream and not run along beside it. 

"Let's lock arms as we cross so the current doesn't carry us down the water fall..."

"Whaa? We're walking through that?"

And, before I was able to wrap my mind around the idea of it all, I reached out and held onto Kelly and Angie and Angie reached over and held onto Karen and locking arms, we took our first steps into the frigid raging water. We sunk in deep at times, sometimes catching each other as we slipped a bit over the rocks beneath us, water reaching upwards to our crotches before we made it to the other side.

It was an amazing experience.

Remember when you were a kid and you were about to get a shot, and you were really nervous and about to cry, but the nurse just magically gave you a shot in such a non-emotional way, doing this distraction thing, that you didn't even know you got the shot, until it was actually all over and you were sucking on your sucker?

That's exactly how it was for me.

"This is what we're gonna do. Lock arms and hold hands and move forward carefully against the stream.."  

It happened so matter-of-fact and so suddenly. Never ever would I have ever considered walking through a raging stream in my $100 pair of running shoes. But I did! And ya know what? They weren't any wetter than when i ran in the rain last Wednesday night during a short 3 mile-run in a downpour with my running group.

(Welll, okay, maybe yesterday they were indeed a bit more water-logged...)

We climbed back up the slippery slope and we were off again.  Slosh-SLOSH-slosh-SLOSH were the sounds of my wet socks inside my shoes. I was surprised (and much relieved) to feel warm and insulated between my wet skin and my running shorts as I ran.

It was mostly all uphill the first half five miles. So steep at times and for such long periods of time, I found myself walking more than running.

I kept repeating to myself, "c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon.." lifting one foot after the other... feeling like a mule carrying a heavy load...  "will this ever get any easier?" 
Kelly says it will. She says these tough uphill runs make you strong.

Seeing views from a place where few people have ever crossed is really quite humbling and overwhelming. And I felt good as well. I stayed on track... kept up with the group as best as I could. I wasn't nearly as slow as I had worried I would be.

What seemed to take forever to reach the top of the mountain, the trails back downhill was quick and it took seemingly no time at all! Nearly back to the car, I heard a roaring sound and remembered the rushing stream.

Taking a deep break and locking arms once again, we crossed the frigid waters, a few feet further up from the waterfall than when we crossed earlier that morning. Karen said, "Doesn't the icy water feel good against your pulled ankle?"

And it did! 

It was like I was icing it while running. Making the most out of situations.

I woke up this morning and I'm glad I had that experience and yes, I do feel sore.
But... it's a good sore.

Like kelly says, "it only makes you strong..."

The friendship between a dog and an orangutan

Watch more National Geographic Channel videos on AOL Video

 
This video shows the friendship between a dog and an orangutan.  I hope you watch this and that it touches you to your very core.

Ran ten and a Half Mile Run at Pt Reyes National Seashore

I woke up extra early and was out of the house by 6:45 to meet my running group to run at Point Reyes National Seashore. 

Heidi, Denise, Sue, Brittany and i climbed into the SUV and drove south to Point Reyes... our chatter sometimes silenced by the beauty of the landscape around us.  Fog laying low on the earth.. the sun above shining so brightly touched down into the low-lying clouds and looked like fairy dust... it really felt magical!


We ran nearly 10-1/2 miles this morning in Point Reyes National Seashore and it was truly a spectacular run... breezing past the Douglas fir forest and along the rushing Bear Valley Creek.  The Bear Valley trail ended here at the end of the california coastline called Arch Rock and so we stopped and took pictures. 

It was incredible!!! This part of of our coastline is not anywhere near roads and cars and people. It probably looks much like it did a hundred years ago. The photo below is probably where the name Arch Rock got its name.

I soaked in the beauty and then sat down on the ground and emptied out a small rock out of my left shoe and smoothed out the wrinkle from my sock on my right shoe... and headed back.


Through the ferns, moss-covered trees and forget-me-nots framing our trail.


In two weeks I will run this again. I plan to film this on my Flip. It really truly is an amazing trail.


By the way, this is along the San Andreas Fault. Apparently it's one of the most scariest places to be if you're ever in an earthquake here.  So.. it's an obvious great place to run if you wanna quicken your pace ... as I did as I ran toward the car.

During Dinner

He blows his nose onto his cloth restaurant napkin... digging deeply with his finger into each nostril and then blowing hard, sounding like a fog horn.

I lift up my shoulders in a cower and bend forward and want to tell him, Can you maybe do that after dinner or can you walk away from the dinner table and maybe use a Kleenex instead?

He does one more wipe around his nose and says, So what's a great girl like you still single? Why hasn't a guy captured you up already!

And I want to tell him, Well, I wouldn't be captured by you, because whenever I see you blow your nose at the dinner table, I want to turn my eyes away in fear of dry-heaving.

But.  I don't.

Instead I just feel kind of embarrassed about being myself.

And he keeps on digging and blowing his nose and says, That’s so weird that you are single....
  
And I silently sit there across from him, as I focus on his fingers indenting into the cloth napkin rubbing up against his nose while he blows even harder.

This is why I enjoy trail running

UltraRunning from Matt Hart on Vimeo.

This video expresses why I enjoy trail running. (And by the way, the beginning of this video shows the beginning of the 100 Western States Race up at Squaw Valley in Lake Tahoe and finishes in Auburn, CA. Kelly has raced it two or three times. Each time I have been there and have crued for her. Waking up and seeing them start out in the early morning in the dark, still makes me cry).

I went running with my sister Kelly tonight after work. I think we ran 7 or 8 miles. It kicked my butt. I felt sore the entire run. My calves felt like they were about to pop. My knees ached. My tendons hurt. My toes cramped. But I just kept moving. Jumping over rocks and roots and mud puddles and it was getting dark and I wondered if we'd run into a mountain lion... because a lot of deer and turkeys were out strolling about and why not the mountain lion? And, I was happy the mountain lion was not out.

In a few days, I'm off to Palm Springs to enjoy the warmth of the sun. Not much running there, so I am happy for the run tonight.   I plan to run another Half-Marathon in May.

I need these races to keep me running....

Bravery

And in that moment... feeling resentment of picking up my next door neighbor's dog poop week after week and throwing it away in my garbage can...  I picked up a pile with my gardening shovel and without thinking of the consequences, I flung it as far as I could over her car in the driveway so it would land in her yard. I misjudged my throw as the poop was only as heavy as cotton and it landed instead, on her car rooftop and some of it slid down her windshield and onto her hood.

The noise of the poop hitting her car, however, was not as quiet as cotton. Suddenly, the neighbor walked outside with her dog.  She had heard it and was coming out to check the skid marks.

It was a moment of sheer panic and embarrassment and I knew I had two options.  To either drop and roll out of sight   ....   or be brave and fess up to the mess.

I decided to side on bravery (and do the right mature thing) and started to rush toward her when she and her dog turned and walked on down the street oblivious to me or the brown smears down her car window.

i stood there, breathless with my heart beating out of my skin and realized that I had just experienced a miracle.

I whispered, thank-you-god, thank-you-god, thank-you-god  while I cleaned up the mess on her car in neck-breaking speed.

And then, after observing the lesson I had just learned from my experience, I shoveled up the rest of the poop, and this time walked closer to the edge of her yard before flinging it.

Just as I should have done from the beginning.

Perspective Tea Party Rug

I was commissioned to draw this tea party scene to be a children's interactive rug. The idea behind this is for the children to have make-believe tea parties with fake plastic food that was packaged with the rug. But... if I were that little girl, I don't think I would have enjoyed eating the plastic food nearly as much as the real thing.

I won! I won!

As I was leaving my house this morning, I glanced over at my house and noticed a small box sitting on my porch. I screeched to a halt and ran up to the porch to grab this lovely surprise.


Guess what it was?


Business cards!!!


I didn't win the lottery, but it sure felt like I did when I won 250 free business cards from Uprinting who were sponsoring a giveaway on Val's art blog! 


I couldn't resist this giveaway. I've always wanted to have my own business card to drop into the bowl at restaurants for a free lunch giveaway and now I can! 


I'm really happy with these. Now i'm thinkin' of using their site to get one of my art pieces printed on canvas! Hmmm... oh the ideas are limitless...


Thanks Val so much!  i LOVE my cards!

Dreaming to Win

Driving home from work this evening I was worrying about my finances, and stopped at the grocery store to pick up a few things and on my way out, I passed the California Lottery machine and spontaneously put a dollar in to play.

And afterwards, while driving home I was so lost in the dream of what it would be like if actually did win ... that when I got home, and pulled up into the garage ... I still sat in my car for the longest time...  feeling giddy, still caught up in the moment envisioning my life as if I had just won!

Its amazing what the imagination can do. In that moment, I was able to shift my feelings of anxiousness to feeling calm and joyful because of where I was inside my head. 

Obviously the chances of winning are slim to none, but a dollar really is worth the dream.

My First Half Marathon: 13.1 miles and covered 1643 vertical feet!

My cramping toes on both feet spread out in every direction ... lookin' like scared petals on a daisy.


Those toes were angry with me and I understood why. I had just put them through the ringer.  But it was all worth it: I had just completed my very first half-marathon. And it wasn't like any other half-marathon. This race was 13.1 miles and covered more than 1643 total vertical feet of climb and descent behind me.

It was 38 degrees out when the gun went off at 8:00 Sunday morning.

I had such adrenalin rushing through me, I just took off ... lost in the heap of the runners running at a quicker pace than I was used to. I didn't see Angie or Heidi or Heather anywhere near me. I was ahead of them... and that began my focus to keep it that way. 

I know you're not supposed to start the race that way. 

You're suppose to start it off slower, so you have some energy in reserve to finish the race with.  But i didn't recognize my pace well enough to know if I was running faster except for not seeing any of the girls around me. So I threw caution to the wind and just ran. One foot after the other. 

The first mile was along a wide gravel road and then we turned onto Canyon trail and began the next four miles of climbing that took us from just over 200 ft above sea level to around 1400 feet above sea level.  Running up to that level was made more difficult by all the rocks sticking up and we had to snake our way around the various boulders and puddles...  the lyrics to the songs playing in my ears were fun and made it more personal.... 

Justin Timberlake singing ... "... so you pass to the left, then you sail to the right..." and Beyonce singing.. "To the left.. to the left.. to the left.. to the left.... "  as I kept maneuvering around the trails, passing some, others passing me... darting left and right, jumping over rocks and puddles... and then I started to feel rundown and worried my english muffin and banana I had for breakfast wasn't enough for this run, so i grabbed a strawberry clif shot block from my pouch.


It was soooo sweet. It was tooo sweet. 

It just sat there dissolving on my tongue and the thick syrupy juice was gliding down around the sides of my teeth and I didn't want to swallow it. I started to feel nauseous and started to dry-heave. That lasted for about 4 miles.


Heather caught up to me just before the second Aid Station and we started running together. We asked how each of us were doing. I told her I felt like I was gonna throw up.  She picked up her pace and I never saw her again.


A few minutes later, I saw my sister at the second Aid Station where she was volunteering and she snapped my picture.  "GO Shawn GO!!" she shouted. "You're doing great!!!!"


She turned to the others at the Aid Station and pointed at me, "That's my sister!"  They waved and cheered me on and I saw my neice Chelsea there, too! Their encouragement gave me so much more energy and off I ran right into this large puddle.

It's not surprising they call this Marsh trail. Running with wet feet... water sloshing around your toes... for 10 miles or more is really an experience. But there was no way getting around it, so i just had to acknowledge it and continue running.


The sisters-in-laws were still behind me. I started to worry I couldn't keep up this pace. But I tried. I really did. I figured I'll hurt for a day or two... but i'll give it my best shot.


I was struggling when I turned onto Ridge trail and was considering walking up the next 20 yards, but I was greeted by a few adults and their children ringing cowbells and carrying signs saying, "WAY TO GO!" and "YOU CAN DO IT!"


It was a perfect place for them to be.  And, I'm quite sure it wasn't by accident. I waved to them and thanked them.. and I picked up my pace as I grappled my way around these large deep ditches that looked like muddy river beds. The boulders were large and I tried to climb above, only to slip and fall back into this heavy deep slushy muck of mud. The mud was so intense, some lost their shoes in it. It was crazy. Each time I would step down into the mud, i felt it grip me back and not want to let me go.


It was somewhere amidst all that winding quick sand that Heidi saw me ahead of her and she zeroed in and I became the target to beat. And she did. Right there around Mile 8 or 9.


"No problem," i thought to myself. "I'll catch her going downhill.." But.   Something serious happened to me when I finally got to the summit and started to cascade down, I almost felt a snap.


I felt a pain that sprung on me that I had never felt before. I felt like a salamander who had it's leg partially severed off.


I had injured my illiotibial band. And from then on... though I was running downhill, it felt uphill all the way. I didn't feel I could control my right leg.


"ow-OW-ow-OW-ow-OW-ow-OW" i would shout for each step I ran. Then I would change it to "youcandoit.. youcandoit... youcandoit... youcandoit..."  then back to "ow-OW-ow-OW-ow-OW-ow". I was running back down that same boulder filled trail again that I started running up 9 miles earlier, only this time I was in pain and my fatigue had dulled my senses and the ability to lift my legs and pass to the left and sail to the right was much more of a struggle.


(this photo was taken around Mile 11... Matt took this and it was so encouraging to see him out there.. I picked up my pace even quicker after this shot was taken and after i saw him)

"ow-OW-ow-OW-ow-OW-ow-OW" ..... "youcandoit.. youcandoit... youcandoit... youcandoit..." 

About a mile and a half before the finish, I ran past a parked ambulance and it's emergency team helping one of our female runners who had taken a really bad fall against the rocky fire road. I stopped for a moment, worried it was Heather. 


"I'm fine... keep running!" the young woman smiled over her tears flowing down her cheeks. It wasn't Heather. I turned around and kept running. I was near the finish.


When I rounded the bend, I could see the crowd and finish line and started to push myself to run harder. I was in so much pain by then, but seeing the finish line .. the pain began to feel numb.


My mom, lloyd, ann, ed, wally, tyler, kate, guilliana, mark, tony and heidi were there to see me at the finish line. Heidi who finished about 6 minutes ahead of me, ran back toward the finish line with me and it helped pick up my pace. 


By the time I crossed the finished line, I had run 13.1 miles and covered 1643 total vertical feet of climb and descent behind me. I came in 11th out of my age group.. but just 222 out of 300 runners. 


Angie's knees were hurting her and she followed behind me equally the same distance as I was behind Heidi.


I am not a runner like my sister. But I ran the race. And that's what mattered to me the most. I did it! I accomplished my goal I had set out to do this past Thanksgiving! 


We really CAN do whatever we put our minds to doing ... if we want it bad enough.


Thank you for keeping up with my "running entries" these past 12 weeks. And for encouraging me along the way. It meant so much to me.  I never ever want to forget how this running experience has felt to me and I hope to do it again real soon.

You gain strength, courage, and confidence 

by every experience inwhich you really stop to look fear in the face. 

You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.

~Eleanor Roosevelt

Week 10: last training run before the race

Well. This is it. Our last week of training before we run more than 13 miles up in the hills this Sunday.

It's been a fun adventure.

I still can't believe I'm about to run this!

After this photo was taken, Anita and I got lost out there on the trails this past Sunday morning. We missed one of the pink ribbons that directed our way.

Coach Marc believes we were gabbing and missed it. He might be right.

But I think we missed it because over Thanksgiving weekend, we ran the same trail but turned right and ran up the road and I think we were thinking we were running the same trail we ran then. ya know... monkey see, monkey do.

But. It was foggy out there. We might've just didn't see it.

When we arrived at the finish line, we received a round of applause. Most of the group was going out for breakfast after the run but we were close to not having that breakfast as they were just seconds away from going on a search for us. We were really that late!

And now fast-forward to tonight.

I am worried about this Sunday. So I ran alone through my neighborhood after work tonight, setting off motion lights all across my neighborhood. Who needed a flashlight?

I set out to run just 30 minutes and by the time I got home, I had run 34 minutes.

It was easy and it felt good.

I really don't know what i'm doing, but I'm about to embark on a half-marathon this Sunday. They say to "take it easy".. so I am.

Wish me well.